Well? Have you been laughing at them since... 16 August? I can't help but laugh most of the time but now it seemed more dire than funny. 2 points from a possible 21, how can it be? But on a lighter note, here are some Spurs-related jokes. I hope I don't get retribution for this because it's only for fun! Take it easy, boys!
A kid goes into a sports shop, and wants to buy a ball, but doesn't have enough money. The shop assistant feels sorry for him and offers to play a game. The boy is blindfolded, and has to hold a club-specific ball, and guess which club the ball belongs to. If he gets them all right, he gets the ball. So he gets the first ball, puts it to his ear and says "Arsenal"
"Wow, you're right," says the assistant, "how did you guess?"
"Oh easy, I heard some guns firing in the distance."
Next ball, the kid picks it up and says "Bristol Rovers,"
"How on earth did you guess that," asks the assistant,
"Oh, I heard a crew of pirates rampaging the high seas."
The assistant gives him the third and final ball, and without hesitating the kid says "Tottenham"
"Amazing," says the assistant, "I expect you heard cockrels didn't you,"
"No," says the kid, "It's going down."
A kid is in court after his parents have been divorced, to decide who he's going to live with. "Would you like to live with your mum?" says the judge, "No, she beats me" says the kid, "Oh," says the judge, what about your dad?"
"NO, he beats me too,"
"Oh dear," says the judge, "any relatives?"
"They all beat me" says the kid.
"Who do you want to live with?" says the judge
"Tottenham Hotspur football club."
"Tottenham Hotspur? Why one arth would you want to live there?" says the judge.
"They never beat anyone."
What's the difference between a triangle and Spurs?
The triangle has 3 points.