Thursday, April 12, 2007

The 'Roles' In Football

Forget about the 'midfielders' and 'strikers' for positions in football. They're outdated terms and frankly, we've been using player's names and their abilities to epitomise a certain role and paste it into our reports and articles. Gone are the days of mentioning the 'anchor-man' role without the name 'Makalele' popping out.

Via <TheOffside>, there's a list of the 'roles' given to modern day footballers and you should really have a look <HERE>. Here are some examples:

Frank Lampard role (Chelsea) – Stand around for a bit. Get the ball. Whack it as hard as you can towards the goal. Hope for a deflection. Lampard thrives because the team is built around him, Makelele and Essien do all the leg work and give him the ball. Sure he’s scored 20 goals – but so could many players if they took every set piece and had 2 other players doing all the work in midfield allowing them to concentrate on shooting as often as possible. Imagine how many goals Lyon’s Juninho or some other more naturally talented player could score if you gave him the freedom and opportunities ol’ Franky enjoys. Maximum results for minimal natural talent defines the ‘Lampard role’.

Jamie Carragher role (Liverpool) – Fancy doing a job and not getting the credit you deserve? Try playing the ‘Carragher role’. The ‘Carragher role’ requires great patience as you are constantly overshadowed by more high profile team mates. You will get international recognition but only fill in for injured players at left-back, right-back and even defensive midfield - but never your natural position. But fear not, for those in the ‘Carragher role’ will soon join those in the ‘Makelele’ role as they are called underrated so often than they become overrated.



After much thinking, I came up with my own 'roles' about footballers and of course, most of them are just stigmas attached to them or even stereotyping. But, whatever. Have some fun with it eh?


The Djimi Traore Role (Or David May) - They are defenders who has gotten the European Cup winners medal, more than John Terry or CAshley Cole can ever imagine. But they're horribly bad defenders that you've totally no idea how they manage it and perhaps, they go under the 'most undeserving European Cup winners' category. But whatever, Djimi is famous for hacking players from behind, giving a large amount of penalties and of course that unforgettable 'Marseille Roulette', made famous by Zinedine Zidane, made infamous by Djimi for scoring with it, against Burnley. Sadly, into his own net.

The Momo Sissoko Role - All you need to do is to run around without direction. You can have an absolutely terrible sense of direction or positioning but fear not, long legs will bring save him from embarrassment. He can tackle well but what he does with the ball after that is most likely to be giving the possession back to the opponents. They call it the 'midfield destroyer', oh yea, sounds like a leaking dam. Passing is non existent under his 'technical ability' row.


Okay, I feel so bad criticising Momo actually. But honestly, everyone has flaws so either you take it seriously or like me, laugh it off. Any suggestions?

4 comments:

Siren said...

Oh my gawd I love this! hahaha

loveuamy said...

true about the momo part. don't feel bad. i'm backing you on this one. lol

Gerek! said...

please do about boumsong lol .. a man who re-defines the really meaning of defence lol

DROGBALLS said...

hehe, that's Titus Bramble role isn't it?! :p